HADES

Introduction

There’s a famous saying. A hero’s only as good as their villain. And that quote rings true. We remember the hero for their great deeds, but who’s going to give them a beast to conquer, a deed to overcome, a quest to complete. The villain, naturally.

Somebody also said, “Every villain is a hero of his or her own story”. Again, the saying rings true. In life, we may act in ways we think are right, but from another point of view, that action was wrong. The villain of every story absolutely thinks they are doing the right thing.

And if we put those two quotes together, you get a mixture that’s too convoluted for my simple mind to pick apart. But buried underneath the layers, you would probably discover that every villain is also the hero, and every hero is also the villain.

What was this all for? A 140 word introduction for this series of articles in which I delve into six movie villains I find exciting and fun to think about. And each of these six villains I think deserves an entry into the VHoF (Villain Hall of Fame). To persuade you, I’ll list six reasons why this villain is such a good villain. (Six because I like synergy). Let’s begin.

Summary

This article, as you probably surmised from the title, is about Hades, Lord of the Underworld and all things unholy. He’s also a part time comedian and occasional WWE announcer. Here are my reasons for why this vicariously mischievous deity should be inducted.

Reason 1

It’s not as if he’s a helpless god with zero powers. Hades is God of the Underworld, lord of the undead! He can shoot fire from his hands, hover above the ground with ease, teleport around even! Hades is very fast, and very dangerous. There are few heroes who could go iso-ball on this guy.

Reason 2

He’s funny. One thing that you can not deny is that the Lord of the Underworld’s pretty amusing. He’s got a, pardon the joke, dead pan style that just makes it so much fun to be around the guy.

Reason 3

He puts on a show. Hades just wants to make life a wonderful theater production. He’s got an eye for talent as well. Hiring Pain and Panic as his minions was a genius move (I still think he knew they would mess up, and enjoys the added challenge of fixing their mistakes). And later there’s the impeccable drafting with Meg. Let’s not forget that instead of fighting Hercules himself, Hades planned this wonderful monster-stepping stone quest for the young hero. First the water centaur, next the hydra, then the giant hog, etc. Hugh Jackman isn’t the greatest showman, Hades is.

Reason 4

He’s a fanboy (fangod?). Look at the giant stone table he’s got in the underworld. There’s just miniatures of all these monsters and heroes moving around on earth. Hades invented World of Warcraft a long time ago. It took us thousands of years to catch up to this guy.  Sure it sucks that he’s treats life as a game, but who among us hasn’t? Hades just wants to sit down, roll some dice, play a little Midas and Minotaurs, and smoke a cigar. 

Reason 5

There are tricksters, then there are tricksters. Hades is above both of those. Not one second is he not scheming up some new way to try and kill Hercules or get an inch closer to his world domination. His entire persona is one of a car salesman. (But since they didn’t have cars, he’s probably more of a chariot salesman). Hades makes deals that greatly help him, while often crippling the other party. Be it Meg selling her soul or Hercules giving up his strength for a day. Hades is a sleazy businessman, and he’s excellent at closing deals.

Reason 6

Some villains relish being villains. They enjoy every act of devilishness, all the facets of villainy, the unmitigated freedom that comes with existing as an evil force. The god of this feeling is Hades. He indulges, partakes in the simplest forms of wickedness, goes out of his way to commit wrongful doings, and screws up the scales of justice just by snapping his fingers. That is what villains do. Hades is a villain in the truest sense of the word.

Outro

Thank for you for your time chairmen and chairwomen of the VHoF (Villain Hall of Fame). It was an honor to present this argument. And I hope you’ll take Hades into consideration as an inductee.